Abortion, Ambiguous, Article, Controversial, Family, Human Rights, Love, Marriage, Rape, Reproductive Rights, Uncategorized, Writing

ABORTION: Let’s Talk Reality

By: Michelle Phoebe

Abortion has been a controversy to many people around the globe. Some countries criminalize abortion, but some others legalize it for certain reasons to support Reproductive Rights. Around 45% of pregnancies among US women in 2011 were unintended and four of ten of these were terminated by abortion, which is 40 out of 100%. There are many non-government organizations that give access to safe pregnancy termination, contraceptive use, and reproductive healthcare.

One of the non-government organizations providing these is Planned Parenthood Federation of America (PPFA). PPFA is one of the organizations in America to provide these rights for women since 1916. Things were going smoothly for the organization, caring for many men and women of their reproductive health, but unfortunately extreme politicians in the Congress, speaking in the name of humanity and religion, find abortion an issue. Therefore, efforts to pull out funding to this organization are coming from a variety of directions. “It’s giving money to an organization that commits abortion,” says Focus on the Family, a California-based non-government organization. Not only will abortion ‘kill’ the infant, but it may be a danger to the mother physically and mentally.

List of countries that make abortions legal only to save the mother’s life:

From the Caribbean From Asia and pacific Middle east and North Africa Europe Sub-Saharan Africa
Argentina Pakistan Kuwait Poland Ethiopia
Bolivia South Korea Saudi Arabia Finland Zimbabwe
Peru Thailand Morocco Germany Malawi
Costa Rica China Netherland Guinea
Switzerland Cameroon
Belgium Burundi
Denmark Burkina Faso
The Netherlands
Ukraine
Norway
United Kingdom

Source: http://www.whichcountryinfo.com/countries-with-legal-abortion/

There are many other countries listed down, like Indonesia for example, if the case is rape or fetal impairment or to save the mother’s life.

Speaking of health issues, there are many ways abortion can physically and mentally damage the mother if not handled correctly. For example, in illegal clinics moving underground to do abortion with very minimum tools essential for doing the process, most women suffer from heavy or persistent bleeding, damage of the cervix, perforation of the uterus, and possible death. For mental health, it can cause the woman to develop a sense of guilt, loneliness or isolation, eating disorders, nightmares, or depression.

But if the clinic is under an organization that is fully supported financially and do not have complications regarding legality, the clinic will responsibly take care of the woman, giving her counseling about the possible side effects and giving her chance after chance to think about the risks. The process will run with less physical issues and the organization will keep her in contact for any mental instabilities. They will keep things in check and make sure everything is well for the woman.

Abortion may post some health problems, but if handled correctly, things will go back to normal. Talking about mental instability, it might take a while for the woman to feel normal again, though it might not erase her guilt. Having a baby – as some might say – “killed” in the mother’s own belly might be a big problem considering humanity and religion, but it would be a bigger problem if the mother is not physically, mentally, and financially ready to take care of her infant. There is another way to prevent women from choosing abortion, though.

A few years back, a man named Mr. Tong Phuoc Phuc who used to work at a hospital based in Vietnam to make a cemetery for aborted babies went on to adopt babies who were planned to be aborted and keep them in the orphanages, having the goal to reunite the children with their mothers when they are already able and settled down to care for them. Unfortunately, one of the orphanages Mr. Tong was running did not hire proper care-givers and manhandled or ‘disciplined’ these toddlers aggressively. However, in 2014, an Australian non-government organization in Vietnam visited the orphanage to check up on the children there. Now, the orphanage is running smoothly with better care-givers who have been trained to teach and give attention to these children and they all looked happy and healthy.

Abortion is still a controversy to this day. Many believe that abortion can save women’s lives in the future when handled correctly and many other believe that there are other ways for the mother and the baby to have a happy life. There are also available options to choose other than abortion. We still do not have concrete answers to whether or not abortion should be legal, or if it is a life-saving solution. But it has been a heavily thought out plan for many women.

 

Sources:

  • The Wall Street Journal: 5 Things to Know About Planned Parenthood
  • Planned Parenthood Federation of America: Abortion Information
  • Huffington Post: White House Rolls Back Protections for Planned Parenthood
  • Which Country Info: List of Countries that Legalize Abortion
  • Guttmancher Institute: Induced Abortion
  • Asia One: Shades of Profiteering and Abuse at Vietnamese ‘Haven” for Unwanted Babies
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Family, Feelings, Love, Self-confidence, Teenage Life, university

Strictly Thinking

“Do you have someone in mind?”

That questions haunts me. Of course, I have a lot of things in mind. My family, for instance. We have grown into such a sustainable groupie. We go through highs and lows with each other. You can tell by the way we treat each other anywhere we go that we deeply love and respect one another.

And then, a job. I know, I just started uni life, so why am I thinking of getting a job? Well, to put it simply, it just makes me feel useful. Other than gaining more experience and loads of cash, I can feel like I am not a useless couch-potato that listens to heartbroken songs every night.

And of course, a someone. I don’t know, I think about a lot of people because I think they’re all very important to me. They’re all the people I hang out with every single day and they’re the ones who shape my character. Because the people you associate with every day can do that; they can change the way you think about life, your perspective, and sometimes even your integrity.

But this particular someone that I’m talking about is…how should I say it? Okay. So, I can’t decide from 2 people. Remember the last blog I wrote called We Don’t Talk Anymore? I have completely forgotten about him, I have moved on, and we’re both fine. We’re now talking and that soothed my mind. I don’t have to think about him anymore. And everything’s absolutely great. It’s been, I don’t know, 5 months? I haven’t had a particular someone in my mind for that long. But now, I guess you can say that I’ve been thinking about these 2 different people for over 2 months in total. The first 1 is very almost-similar-to the We Don’t Talk Anymore guy, which blows my mind. Almost everything about him is similar. Almost. And he’s this shy cool guy that everybody loves. He’s so talented. And he’s cute. The second guy is different than the We Don’t Talk Anymore guy and the first one. He’s very laid back and open-minded. He’s really funny. I can relate to him in so many ways and vice versa. He’s like my doppelganger, literally. He’s older and he’s wise. He can get serious when we have to, but he can get really funny when we don’t. And he handles me really well. He treats me right. We both respect each other and I think we both like each other’s company. And the best one yet: he’s heterosexual. So we can look at all these clothes and have the same reaction to everything. It’s really fun having him around.

I don’t think about the second guy very often, since we both know that we are not into relationships and we want to go through with our lives first. So I guess you can say I admire his character. He makes me feel comfortable, but just that and nothing else. The first guy however, is enticing. Whenever I see him, my heart starts pumping and heat radiates through my body. It’s insane. I do not want to fall  for the same things. It’s not right, I know that. But every time I look at him, every time he smiles, and every time he cracks a joke and laughs hard with his friends…it gets me going. It makes me smile, too. He’s looks like a really good guy. I don’t know for a fact that he is, but seeing him almost all the time makes me think that he might be the perfect guy.

Which is horrible because he’s sort of similar to the other guy.

 Anyways, that’s all I’m thinking. This is not a serious thing. This is strictly thinking. Just thinking.

Family, Hardships, My Wonder-Working God, Teenage Life

Internship

So I just graduated from high school and currently on the holidays. Holidays from getting out of high school to going to college are very long, around 3 to 4 months. So, I have decided to be an intern. Where, you ask? At my church. It’s an organization. It’s a social thing. So this organization I applied to is very heart-warming. Why? Because it’s an organization to strengthen and build connections in families. This organization is called Focus on the Family. You might have heard of this organization somewhere in the states like in Colorado or maybe you have never heard of it at all. So let me tell you a little bit about it.
Being an intern at FOFI (Focus on the Family Indonesia) is breath-taking. Yes, it’s hard, it’s got a lot of tasks at hand, it makes you sweat buckets and buckets full, and it’s sort of numbing. But I love it. Because this organization is the beginning of life. I remember when I was in junior high school that my friends weren’t very close to their families, and even if they were, they were very…let’s just say, mean. And awkward. I’ve always thought of myself as the most blessed teenager in the world, because I get to be close to both of my parents, and even my brother. Although we fight a lot, too.
Why do I think this organization is heart-warming, you ask? Well, for starters, I just got in to this organization this week, and they have already given me a handful. So the first task they gave me was to translate horrible-numbers of papers from English to Bahasa Indonesian. Now this would be so easy, if it were the other way around. Bahasa Indonesia has never been my thing, but I said yes to the task anyway. As I started squeezing my brain out for good Bahasa Indonesian words (good thing there’s Google Translate, though), I started reading the entire program. And it made my heart ache a little. Reading their entire program about building commitment and affirming love to one another in a family was just…wow. I don’t think you would understand it when I tell you, because you will have to read and translate it yourself (like please help me), but seriously, their program touched me. Their events touched. Their entire thing just touched me in a way no one has ever touched me before. So they have 6 main events: Mother & Daughter, Mother & Son Cookout, Father & Daughter Date, Father & Son Camping Trip, Husband & Wife Date Night, and Marriage Encounter. Each event has exciting and deep ways to strengthen one’s bond to another. Every word they put in those papers for their rundown on the program, I take them to heart and it’s amazing what they are doing. The events are a bit costly, but they work. I went to one of the events way before I got into this intern thing. Let me tell you the story of that.
So weeks before the Father & Daughter Date, my mom bought two tickets. She told me that I will have to take the ticket and go to the event with my dad. I said no. “But you need it. It’s good for you. This event is gonna be like a Gatsby party. You’ll love it!” my mom had said, but I still declined. After being so pushy and annoying, I started to cry that night before I slept. I felt imprisoned to do it. It didn’t feel at all like I was gonna go to a fancy Gatsby party. It felt like she was pushing me into a shrink filled with daughters who have daddy-issues. I don’t need fixing with my dad, I had thought, it’s not important. My dad didn’t let out a single reaction about the event. He was basically very private about his feelings. After weeks have passed, the event was on. My mom forced me into a black dress and such and I finally said to myself that she wasn’t going to let go of this. I finally tamed my feelinga down and just went with the day. When I got into the event was held, I was impressed. It wasn’t like a huge Gatsby party. It was a small room, but they decorated it good. They wanted me to be their model for the event, so I said yes. My dad and I did the video-shoot for the event and after it was done, we both went inside and the event started. It was awkward between me and my dad. Like it was out of place. Yes we talked and smiled and laughed, but that wasn’t enough. That wasn’t enough to fill the large hole inside my heart and the gap in my family. I was surprised to see my close friends being the heart-felt speaker of the event. Fortunately, I knew every single one of the people in the room, as the daughters, fathers, even the staffs and the EO of the event. I was chill at first, but then my friend started speaking. And then she started crying. And then I started crying. She talked about her father, how she never had the perfect figure of a dad in her life and I smiled at her from my seat. We both sort of made each other cry LOL. And I started crying really hard. There is always something about her that makes other people feel her in ways I could never comprehend.
Well overall, each event gives us the opportunity to answer questionaires, write deep and even dark letters to one another. The events simply wanted all of us to start opening the ugly scars in our hearts, pour it out on a page, and start bonding. Because honestly, my generation and under sucks at bonding with our parents. Truly. Not only is there a gap of age but also a gap of communication. And FOFI gives us ways to bridge the gap between these families.
So basically, I love my job. I’m sitting at junior high school right now, taking pictures of moments. I’m helping out at another organization, called No Apologies. This organization are buddies with FOFI. No Apologies is basically an organization that roams around teenagers. While FOFI is about building families together, No Apologies are breaking down the horrible pattern of social media and helping teenagers build self-confidence and letting them know how much they are worth to stay away from SEX before marriage, DRUGS, and to know a deeper meaning of LIFE and LOVE. They’re pretty cool, too, although this place reeks and currently sweating buckets full.
So yeah, being an intern at FOFI and helping out at NA is awesome. I’m not only helping other families and teenagers around Indonesia, but I am also helping myself out. My director of FOFI, Valerie Mellanov Gan, told me that the best way to help yourself out is to help others out. It’s very true. And what’s also cool is that she’s my mom’s BFF so things aren’t as shaky. Anyways thank you for reading and I am so sorry I haven’t been posting anything lately. I just got inspiration today. Hehe

Family, Hardships, Love vs. Lust, My Wonder-Working God, Teenage Life

Questions to Answer

So, I know a lot of you here have a lot of questions about hardships in family, work, school, even within yourself and I want to help each and every one of you with that. Although I am 18 years of age and maybe most of you here are older than me, I hope that you will give me a chance to imrpove myself by thinking twice before answering anything. If you need questions that need answering, just post a comment below and I will answer with a humble and wise heart 🙂